This week Arizona seems to have finally gotten the message about fall. It’s even been a bit rainy, which is a total bonus to the cooler weather. I feel like I talk about the weather quite a bit on here, but really when you live in an extreme climate, it’s kinda hard to avoid. (#sorrynotsorry)
Nonetheless, fall is finally here and so is my trip to Morocco! I leave on Friday so I’ve been scrambling around with all the last minute details. This idea of being so “unprepared” this close to departure is giving my Type A serious anxiety. But we won a new project at work and with the short staff it’s been…hectic. Yeah, we’ll go with that. (smile) I am very excited to be going on this trip, but I think I’ll feel a whole lot better when I’m finally on a plane!
Stress is a funny thing. Sometimes it makes you superwoman in terms of getting sh*t done, other times it can ruin all the good. It’s been a roller coaster of those emotions the last month or so. Recently the anxiety has been giving me issues and it takes quite a bit of talking myself out of my own head to see reason. Even then I sometimes have to resort to other measures. I’ve had rounds with depression in the past and as crazy as this may sound, I think I prefer it to this anxiety business. Depression, for me, comes tinged with an apathy that sorta puts things in stasis. Anxiety, however, is the complete opposite – I care about everything way too much all the time. The constant feeling of needing to somehow change something to make it go away gets overwhelming. It’s also a relatively new creature for me so I’m still learning how to deal.
Luckily there are such amazing things as Xanax and lavender oil. I’ve been experimenting quite a bit lately with essential oils for FM but I found them to be so startlingly effective that I started dabbling with blends for other stuff as well. I found an awesome diffuser and it has become my nightly companion. It’s actually (laughably) a bit bemusing just what a positive impact certain scents have on my moods, etc. It’s like a magic that’s real but incredibly hard to accept as real. Either way, I’ve been totally rocking it and as long as it works, I’m happy (literally).
One of the great things about being on a semi-blogging-break is that I’ve been able to edit a lot of photos and start some drafts. I reached a point where I began to feel like the words here just weren’t genuine and that bothered me. I admit that part of that is watching these other blogs I’ve been following evolve into these “brands.” I caught myself doing a bit of that – writing posts that I thought others wanted to read. I mean I hope what I write is interesting, but I want to write what comes to mind without any ulterior motives. It’s so easy to get caught up in the social flow, sometimes I just need to take a step back and reevaluate. I suppose the more concise way to say this is – I’m looking forward to being back on a more regular basis. And keeping it real. Of course.
So I’m off to finish errands and to start packing it all up! I’m looking forward to foreign lands but also to several local adventures when I get back. And then sharing it all!
Here’s to exciting adventures and new ideas!!
P.S. Don’t forget you can also follow my adventures on Instagram!